Addiction – a poem

Managing feelings after abuse can be extremely challenging. Below is a poem written by a young person at The Green House.

Addiction

A poem by Corrin

I love you and hate you at the same time.

I love how you picked me up when no one was there, even if you wasn’t the best thing to go to.

I love how you can make me happy, all for the wrong reasons of course but the little things no one talks about.

It’s always been the littlest thing that can make me happy, I’m used to it, I’ve never had big things to love.

I love how you take so much away from me, sometimes it’s too much, but I didn’t care..

I just wanted to feel like how it was before.

But love can switch so fast and become hate.

I hate how you’ve separated me from things,

Hate how you’ve brought me closer to the people with the same problem,

Hate how my old friends seem no fun or boring just because you’ve made nothing fun without you,

Hate how you block things from my mind and when your gone they all come back,

Hate waking up and not remembering what happened,

Hate how I’ve watched you slowly take over,

Hate the trust you’ve taken away from me and

Hate always being asked; are you high?

Hate how people don’t notice it’s becoming bad,

Hate how I make relationships around you ,

Hate the reputation I hold because of u,

Hate the scars I hold from you,

Hate it always being about you,

Hate the wanting and not having,

Just hate it when your not someone I can rely on and is able to stay.

U can’t stay forever but you’ll always stick with me

As much as you mess me up I keep coming back I don’t care anymore don’t care what you do just want you.

I love you and hate you for all that you’ve done.

If you or someone you care about is struggling with addiction, find information on where to get support here and read about other young people’s experiences of addiction here. If you’re based in Bristol, check out Bristol Drugs project.